Warning: Don't be like me
2020.12.01 22:04 beenInTherapyFor12 Warning: Don't be like me
I just went and made a spreadsheet of how much I've spent on dating apps over 2017-2019 and its pretty ugly, all for 0 results lol. Almost 3k USD. https://imgur.com/a/EKc1OdQ
Only matches were with bots, onlyfans/snapchat premium sellers, 1 single mom who wanted me to take care of her kid, and 2 "dates" where we agreed to meet at a mall or restaurant and then they never showed up. Just want to provide some perspective here since I know people out there have it worse than me, but I really feel like dating apps and their "premiums" are predatory towards unattractive males like myself. Maybe one day the government will step in and regulate them - I mean the government already sued match group for fraud (link
) . Also I have no standards in regards to looks and can prove it by sending pictures of girls I've warm-approached. Turns out dating just isn't for some humans. Normal people can use dating apps without paying for them - if you have to pay for them you are probably do not meet the minimum bar of attractiveness.
Wish you all the best of luck and happy dating.
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2020.07.16 00:32 aBitofKindness List of June Stories
- Sorcerer's Father - 1,857
- Alien Missionaries - 300
- Drifter - 1,584
- Five Perspectives (The Awful Truth) - 918 ⭐
- Stopping Time Stops Photons, Too - 417
- Marked for Death - 662
- Puppy Cerberos - 563
- Great Hero Stops Caring - 973
- To-Do List at Birth - 958
- Dragon Wrangling - 788
- Slave Who Changed Fate - 581
- "You make the world worth saving" - 1,966
- Protective Monster Under Bed - 562
- Genie to Your Bully - 445
- Chocolate Milk - 534
- Humanity Has Done It All - 76
- Time Travel Blunders - 863
- The Exposition Guy - 1,194
- Narrator versus Main Character - 1,386
- Secret Dragon Meeting - 237
- Sleep Paralysis Murder Mystery - 1,658
- Cursed Knife to Cut Off Hair - 344
- Depot - 1,885
- Monster Slayer - 793
- Schneller Station Research Observatory - 542
- A Break on the Chimney Stacks - 534
- Reflection Infection - 1,334
- Time Traveler Stuck With Dinosaurs - 1,278
- Two Hours Left - 622
- Immortality and Loss - 1,028
- The Best Version of You - 904
- Why Not End the World's Suffering - 1,007
- Master Wizard Team - 1,359
- Llamas With Hats Prequel - 373
- God of Empathy - 1,697
- Summoning the Lord of the Underworld - 858
- Yandere Phone - 1,655
- Time Travel Rule #1 - 2,440
- Dot Com Killer - 451
- Sheriff With No Gun - 1,446
- A Carnival and a Key - 299
- Carne Vale - 594
- The Old Johnson Cabin - 810
- Supervillain's Girlfriend is Superhero - 1,042
- Discovery of Puhn's Destruction - 1,376
- Sadness is Beautiful - 1,257
- Electric Fields Choose-Your-Own-Adventure - 976
- In Love With Aroace - 667
- CPS versus Quest to Stop the Dark Lord - 366
- Fire Mermaid - 264
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2020.06.29 22:57 Vemel Online dating seems inherently warped - a rant
Disclaimer: I haven't actually used online dating yet, so to a degree this is conjecture.
I started typing this as a response to this thread
, but I think it's worthy of its own discussion.
If you don't feel like clicking that - it's a thread from yesterday referencing the FTC suing Match Group last September
, for "unfair and deceptive trade practices". I haven't seen the hard data to confirm this, but it made me think more about Match Group and dating companies in general - how they operate, and how they may be impacting people, especially us.
Match Group is a billion-dollar company, majority-owned by IAC, a holding company that owns a whole lot of websites. They own dozens of dating sites/apps, including many of the most prominent ones: Match (obviously), OKCupid, Tinder, Hinge, and PlentyOfFish. Of interest to me in particular though is OKCupid, because of the depth and detail users are encouraged to go into compared to other platforms, as well as the apparent demographics that, combined, from my research at least, appeared to make this ideal for those who are young, liberal, tech-savvy, nerdy, perhaps kinky, and are looking for something serious, while not even having to pay for the service. They had an independent, data-heavy, disruptive approach to solving the dating puzzle, with a real ethos
, criticizing the company who would later buy them out.
I read from time to time on /OkCupid
how Match Group have seemingly been gradually dismantling the platform since they acquired it, turning OKCupid into more and more of a streamlined swiping clone. And yet, if/when I eventually attempt to date, it still seems like the best option for me. I know who I am; bars are not for me. I'm not going to just walk up to someone I know nothing about in a store and turn into human spam. My hobbies and interests are solitary and/or male-dominated so I'm very unlikely to find someone in an in-person social group (and it's perhaps a bit disingenuous to join with such an intent). Frankly, it's online or bust, and that makes me feel a bit helpless, as not only do I have many disadvantages by virtue of being myself, I'm kind of at the mercy of capital. Basically, at any time, out-of-touch rich people can tinker around with what are likely the only tools I have at my disposal in trying to search for a partner.
And ever since Tinder came onto the scene, the online dating landscape has been growing increasingly mobile, increasingly image-centered, and increasingly focused on short-term relationships. Match Group in particular is actively trying to foster a hookup culture
, structuring its business around a caricature of an urban 20something woman and a lifestyle they've decided she wants - pushing endless swiping and perpetual singlehood as something empowering and progressive. And sure, there's a place for flings and one-night-stands and whatever. I don't really care that some people are doing that. What bothers me is how top-down this all is. The technology arrives, a flashy product is designed, but was anybody really asking for this? Of course people are using the apps - but probably because they feel it's their only or best option.
Nevermind that the tinderization of OKCupid is a complete betrayal of its original premise - all the sites and apps are ultimately designed to make money, and now they've learned that it's more profitable to make it harder to find a lasting connection. It's more profitable to keep you swiping over and over again, and luring you into paying for dubious premium memberships.
It's really fucked up when you think about it. Online dating and apps only continue to become the new normal for an increasing percentage of people, so essentially what is happening is that corporate greed is gaining a stranglehold on the infrastructure through which we meet our most basic human needs for connection, and create the next generation. For people like us who often look to online dating as a lifeline, they are to a degree holding our love lives hostage. It's parasitic and predatory, and more people need to be calling this out for what it is.
Match Group needs to be broken up, but I hope we could go even further, and remove the profit motive altogether. If it can be sustainable, I'd love for there to be a non-profit dating platform, that cuts out the glamour and artificial limitations and simply has a mission to help people find what they want. I wonder if Jimmy Wales would be up to it. Wikipedia makes most of its money from donations. Could that work? Or in lieu of that, run unobtrusive ads (though there could be privacy concerns
It wouldn't stop people from being people, confused and self-sabotaging as we sometimes are - and hey maybe there's no one for me - but there's gotta be something better for people, especially not-hot oddballs like you and me, than logging onto OKCupid (or your platform of choice) and hoping you can find somebody before Joey Levin
or some other asshole renders it unuseable for a tiny increase in revenue.
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2020.01.20 05:03 alien557 What are the best online dating sites/apps and is it worth it in general?
I want to try online dating, because I'm almost 30 and I've been single for a long time. I do get discouraged from trying it especially because of things like this
and especially this
. So what websites won't connect me to fake accounts or try dirty tricks to keep me coming back? Or should I just ditch it and try something else (I don't know what though)
Also any advice for online dating in general would be appreciated.
What are the best online dating sites/apps and is it worth it in general?
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2019.12.03 23:43 tggrinc1st Things you need to know about online dating sites before you sign up. Part Three.
As winter and the holidays approach the numbers of people searching for companionship online and joining dating websites rises. So it's time to remind everyone of the fraudulent behavior that those dating sites engage in. These are deliberately fraudulent activities designed to get lonely people to spend money on their sites.
If you have not seen part one or of this post I suggest that you start with those:
Part 1: https://www.reddit.com/OpinionsReviewsViews/comments/e37b5d/things_you_need_to_know_about_online_dating_sites/
Part 2: https://www.reddit.com/OpinionsReviewsViews/comments/e38idi/things_you_need_to_know_about_online_dating_sites/ Plenty of Fish, Match, OK cupid, and Tinder are all owned by the same company and all of them engage in some variation of the fraudulent behaviors that I will be describing.
But they are not alone in this. Every dating site employs some or all of the fraudulent strategies described below. Some have their own variations on these schemes but they all have the same end goal. NOTE:
The more sexually oriented the site, the more they will lie. The lies will be bigger and they will be more aggressive in their attempts to defraud you. You are far more likely to be the victim of credit card fraud and identity theft on these adult oriented sites. This includes Adult Friend Finders, Ashley Madison, and other self-proclaimed sex dating sites.
The last habit that these sites engage in is illegal. They charge men for services that women receive for free.
It's no secret that there are more men looking for women than there are women looking for men. So, just like bars giving free drinks to women, these sites give free or discounted services to women with profiles that generate a lot of activity. It doesn't matter if these women are actively looking to meet anyone or even continue to use the site. Their profiles are promoted heavily and shown as active. So while men are charged a premium for memberships or views or other services, many women are given those same services for free.
Giving free services to women that men have to pay for is sexual discrimination. Which is illegal.
Ok, so you've read part one and two. You may be thinking that they would stop committing fraud after being caught and sued repeatedly. If so, you'd be wrong. Here are some of the most recent articles that popped up in a google search for Match.com fraud. 2014: Stealing pictures from social media sites for use in fake profiles.
According to a lawsuit Yuliana Avalos filed against the popular dating website, more than 200 bogus Match.com profiles were created using her pictures. She maintains that hundreds, possibly thousands of fake profiles are posted on the site, including those using her pictures, even though she's never signed up for the site. https://www.datingsitesreviews.com/article.php?story=match-com-sued-by-florida-woman-for-using-her-photos-in-more-than-200-bogus-profiles 2019 Age discrimination:
A settlement has been reached in Kim v. Tinder, Inc., et al. Kim claims that Defendants violated California Law (xxx) by charging a higher price for subscriptions to Tinder Plus and Tinder Gold to persons who were 29 years of age or older. Kim filed the lawsuit on behalf of a class, seeking damages and restitution. https://www.tindersettlement.com/ https://www.foxnews.com/tech/tinder-settles-age-discrimination-lawsuit-for-17 2019: Using fake profiles to trick users into buying services.
The FTC filed charges against match.com. The Federal Trade Commission sued online dating service Match Group, Inc. (Match), the owner of Match.com, Tinder, OKCupid, PlentyOfFish, and other dating sites, alleging that the company used fake love interest advertisements to trick hundreds of thousands of consumers into purchasing paid subscriptions on Match.com. https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/press-releases/2019/09/ftc-sues-owner-online-dating-service-matchcom-using-fake-love
Based on their track record and their willingness to repeatedly defraud tens of thousands of users, There is no reason to believe that the owners or employees of these sites have any integrity whatsoever. They feel no moral obligation to behave in a forthright or honest manner.
So while you may find a few real people on their sites, you will have to wade through thousands of fake, spam, and malicious profiles that are there for only one reason. To take advantage of you and steal your money.
And those are the people operating the "legitimate" dating sites like Match, OK cupid, Plenty of Fish, etc. It should go without saying that you should never download any software from these sites.
That goes double for installing apps on your phone.
If you see an advertisement for an adult/sex dating site, use your common sense. Do drop dead gorgeous models really need a website to meet men? Is there an army of barely eighteen year old girls waiting for average looking, average income, or older men to date them? Don't be stupid. The Match group is owned by IAC, Inter Active Corp.
The Match group runs a variety of sites and has it's own subsidiaries. This is a partial list of sites and subs owned and operated by the Match group. There are others that are so similar in name or appearance that I assume that they are run by the same company under alternative company names.
- Plenty of Fish
- OK Cupid
- Our Time
- Twoo (french)
- Meetic (european)
- Pairs (asian)
- Hinge (tied to facebook)
Match group subsidiary People media runs these sites:
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2019.09.25 22:25 acerod1 Match.com Used Scammers’ Profiles to Trick Its Dating Service Users, FTC Says
It’s a heartless thing to do: Tell a person looking for a love that someone is into them—even though the secret admirer doesn’t exist. But it’s even worse to introduce that person to a romantic predator, in order to make a buck.
In a lawsuit
filed on Wednesday, the Federal Trade Commission says
the dating site Match.com did all of these things to hundreds of thousands of the dating service’s users—dashing their romantic hopes while shaking them down for subscriptions.
According to the FTC, Match notified its users about “likes,” emails, and instant messages from people it had identified as probable scammers. The notifications came in the form of ads like “You just caught his eye…Could he be the one? READ HIS EMAIL” that urged the users to upgrade to a paid subscription in order to communicate with their suitor.
By contrast, the FTC claims, Match would block the scammers from reaching those who were already paying members.
The tactic appears to have been effective. The FTC claims nearly half a million people purchased Match subscriptions or upgraded from free trials in response to scammy communications between 2016 and 2018. Once users signed up in response to the fake missives, Match would either inform them the interested user was no longer available or, worse, put them in touch with the scammer.
So-called “romance scams
” are pervasive on dating sites and social media platforms like Facebook
, and typically involve the scammers, who are often overseas, pressuring victims to give them money. The FTC estimates the scams produced $884 million in losses between 2015 and 2017 and that, in the case of Match, 25% to 50% of those who register on the site are crooks.
In an email to Fortune
, a Match spokesperson described the FTC’s complaint as “completely meritless allegations.”
Match.com’s parent company, Match Group, is the biggest dating company in the U.S., owning 25% of the market, and approximately 45 dating services, including Tinder and Plenty of Fish. In response to the FTC complaint, the company’s shares slid around 2% on Wednesday.
The FTC’s complaint also includes further allegations of unfair or unethical practices. These include what the agency alleges are misleading offers of money-back guarantees if a user does not “meet someone special,” and a practice of cancelling the accounts of those who complain about unauthorized charges.
The FTC also cites internal communications from Match employees and executives to portray what it says are “confusing and cumbersome” cancellation policies.
“[The policy is] hard to find, tedious, and confusing. Members often think they’ve cancelled when they have not and end up with unwanted renewals,” says a Match executive cited in the complaint. “The current process takes over 6 clicks.”
If the FTC prevails in the dispute, Match.com will likely be the on hook for tens or hundreds of millions of dollars. In its complaint, the agency seeks an order enjoining Match.com for deceptive practices as well as civil penalties for violation of the Restore Online Shoppers’ Confidence Act, a law that provides for fines of up to $42,530 for each violation.
More must-read stories from Fortune:
—The cheapest mobile plans
for your iPhone 11
—What is quantum supremacy
, and why is it such a computing milestone?
—Beyoncé was sued
for violating the Americans with Disabilities Act. And you could be, too
—Meet the women leading Netflix
into [the streaming wars
Discord is one of tech’s hottest startups__Catch up withData Sheet, Fortune’s daily digest on the business of tech. * More Details Here
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2015.10.21 16:10 autotldr Early Match.com users didn't have any digital pictures of themselves -- so they'd snail mail or fax in pics or scan them at Kinkos
This is an automatic summary, original
reduced by 91%.
After changing hands a few times in the late 1990s, Match is now the centerpiece of Internet firm IAC's digital dating empire, which also includes sites like OKCupid, Tinder, BlackPeopleMeet, and Chemistry.com. Summary Source FAQ Theory Feedback Top five keywords: Match#1 site#2 Date#3 online#4 early#5
Dial-in dating bulletin board systems existed at least as far back as the 1980s, and couples met through early online services like CompuServe-conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh even met his third wife through that network-but for many early Match users, the site was their first foray into online flirtation.
Match gave its members anonymous email addresses that forwarded to their real accounts-a big deal before throwaway webmail accounts were widespread-and emphasized that potential matches wouldn't be alerted when you browsed their profiles.
Most early users didn't have any digital pictures of themselves-Wayman recalls she hadn't even seen a digitized photo until she started working at Match, since she used a text-only network on her home DOS machine-so they'd snail mail or fax snapshots to Match, or need help finding a place to scan them in.
Yagan, who's now the head of the Match Group, which includes IAC's dating sites and a few other online properties, entered the field in 2004 as a cofounder of OkCupid.
As of last year, the site has an updated iOS app with swipe-to-like and proximity-based features similar to Tinder-another Match Group property that's arguably upstaged both Match and OkCupid in recent years.
Post found in /technology.
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2014.01.16 22:55 lighteningcakes How to monetize a Tinder-like app for friends and make it a working business model
I'm looking to join a business plan competition, and I would like some advice on one of my potential options. I'm thinking of going with the idea of a Tinder-like app that allows you to find friends. The premise would be finding people who could potentially be your best mates. I know this isn't revolutionary, but I feel like it could be a good alternative to Tinder. Tinder is a fun app, but it's not very helpful if you want to bond with someone over mutual interests, and especially not if you want to find a friend of the same sex. There was a thread
that talked about something like this. I would want to create a new app that focuses more on personality, hobbies, favorites local spots, and other things. You could choose if you want to find girl friends, guy friends, or both. One of my main concerns is finding a way to monetize the app. From what I understand, Tinder is not currently generating revenue, though they are developing ideas now. Maybe a call to action for meeting up with your friend matches. There could be section in the app that has suggestions for places to meet up with your new friend, and local coffee shops, bars, pubs, restaurants, etc can offer coupon incentives within the app. Are there any other possible ways that this app could make money? Is this a bad business idea in general, or does it have potential?
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